I haven’t cut my hair this week.

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I haven’t cut my hair this week. This is progress for me.

I posted a photo on Instagram of jeans I was going to distress the other day.

Then I cut up one of my t-shirts.

I am a person who is often not in tune with myself. Rather I look at my behaviors and I learn things about myself. I am stressed, I know this because I have been destroying  things  crafting. When I get stressed I cut my hair. This is something that I can control.

For me it is all about control and it always has been. This even explains why I clean other people’s houses. It is something that I can control. This is also why I craft, it helps my sense of control.

For me, it is all about control. I cling to control when I am anxious and worried. I try to control something, anything in my life. This is also why I think I blog a lot when I am stressed. It is a simple task, that I can accomplish in a relatively short amount of time that makes me feel like I am in control.

It keeps me from focusing on all the things I can’t control.

I cannot get rid of the anxiety. It’s something that is a part of my personality and my life and, to some degree it is even helpful.

I am just working on channeling it into an activity that is healthy or at least socially acceptable, like crafting.

Take a moment, look at your behaviors. I bet you can learn something from them and learn what you are feeling from how you are behaving.

In the meantime, I will be distressing some more jeans…with anxiety it is all about the little victories.

 

 

 

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